A Midnight Buffet

They met at a conference. It was a shallow connection. The only thing that interested her was that he was in to Salsa dancing. She expressed interest that she would like to check out the Salsa scene in Mumbai while she was here.

Soon they were at a Salsa place. She wasn’t really a dancer but he thought she had a good time at the Salsa dance Party. After the party she said, I want to check out the midnight Buffet at this place. She had her plans pre thought out. While she must have been at-least 15/20 years younger to him, She was the one who knew what she wanted, until the midnight buffet.

The Midnight Buffet talks

They hadn’t really gotten much to talk with the loud music at the club, now in the quietude of the 5 star restaurant she started talking. This was when the penny dropped. He realised that he was with a teenager with teenage issues. She talked about her problems with her parents and her life.

He felt he was struck by a sledge hammer. He couldn’t relate at all to what was happening. He wanted out, but how could he leave the young girl and leave. But eventually the midnight buffet ended at 3pm. As the valet was getting the car, he was furious, he didn’t like how the evening had gone. He decided to do some Adult talk.

The Ride back to home

They both sat in the car and headed to drop her at her place. He made the move. He caught her hand, and asked her if she wanted to go to his home? He admired her for her calmness, she was not scared of much older guy who wanted her. She calmly shook her head in “No”. He thought maybe she isn’t sure and just shy. He again took her hand and requested her to spend the night at his place. This time her NO was firm.

He knew this was it. He had his adult talk and now should drop her home. But still he didn’t like the idea of the cold bed home. He asked her once again, she said NO.

They didn’t speak much, he dropped her and went home. He didn’t feel bad. He knew she was firm and he had no chance of a one night stand.

Walking up to a Stranger and telling you lust for her.

Things are tough for guys. If you tell a women you really want her and if that doesn’t come out right. You could be in deep trouble. One reporter friend told me how a techie was arrested for solicing online over Linkedin.

I am petrified of soliciting girls. I say girls, because I don’t have access to a pool of divorcee, middle aged women. I had decided that I was out of the dating/lust scene. But man is basically a horny animal, till he is counting his final breaths.

It is scary to tell a millennnial woman you want her bad, to tell her you like the shape of her. How you would like to feel her, see her naked. Atleast I haven’t bothered to tell anyone so far.

Recently I changed my mind. Though I am a old body, whose teeth might last another decade or so and most of the hair has already gone with the winds. I decided to get in the game.

The Problems

For all the feminism bullshit. It is really difficult to find a woman alone in public spaces without a man. All this talk about independence of Indian woman is very hypocritical #IMHO.

If I am attracted to someone, either she is with her boyfriend, friends or colleages. In short she is already having a good time.

Normal Places to approach a girl

I don’t do tinder. I have no time for it. I don’t flirt on social media. The only time I get flirty is when I am in the cafe or commuting. I like to experince real life.

How to tell a woman you lust for her, without getting reported to the police?

The biggest conflict in my mind is how to tell a completely unknown woman that she is beautiful without her reporting you the police or worse asking the public to beat you.

Respectable places to propose to a woman.

I was wondering, this attraction to strangers of mine can be dangerous. I have to choose a place which is safe enough, where the woman are used to this culture of guys being honest and upfront.

Bars and Lounges

I don’t like the kind of woman who frequent bars and lounges. I haven’t found a single interesting woman there. They are not my type.


Yes, Coffeeshops are my scene. I spend a lot of time there and do end up meeting some amazing people.

Events, Museums or Art galleries

I was checking out this exhibitions of paiting and murals. As I was walking in anti-clockwise direction. I saw a beautiful woman walking clockwise. I was immediately attracted to her complexion. I thought she was so beautiful, I need to tell her that. I checked her again, yes I loved her hair.

The Beautiful Painter

I evaluated my decision to approach her for few seconds. I went up to her and asked her who were the artists. She was lost for words. I thought she has realised what is going to follow. I thought well, better for me.

After a few minutes she told me some names of the Artist. I asked her if she paints, she said yes.

I thought there was no much conversation which I could carry on with her. She was for some reason tongue tied. I switched to Hindi, thinking she couldn’t speak English well.

The Proposal

I tell her “ You have a beautiful complexion.”

There is momentarily blushing on her part and then an unbeleivable look. I try to look her from her face to her toes and try to tell her without words, doesn’t she know how beautiful she is? She acts surprised. I wonder, if I am the first man to tell her this?

It is then my turn to roll my eyes and tell her, it is a musuem and I thought it was apt to offer you an complement. She finally throws in a look of understanding. I am releived that we have finally made peace.

The Phone Number

A bit cheesed off, i decide to walk away. But I couldn’t. I turn back and ask her if she would like to exchange numbers. She is speechless and after a few seconds, blurts out “ But, who are you?”. I think, is that really important ? I feel like saying I am Bond, James Bond. I tell her a glamorus lie, I am a journalist. She seems releived.

I ask her number again, she is reluctant to pass it on. I realise this is a too brazen for her. She doesn’t do this kind of stuff. But neither do I. I ask her the 3rd time, a bit exasperated. I take out my phone, she hurriedly tells me her number. I ask her name and say thanks. I walk away.

Before leaving the gallery, I try calling her. Her number is not reaachable. I check her number on true caller. It is indeed the correct number.