Its been sometime that I have this morning depression problem (no Im not pregnant!!). I wake up thinking I have nothing to look forward to in life, i count most of my relationships as failures, which has either not lasted or I have given up because they was no JOY left in it.
There is no general solution for depression, some strangers and freinds checked on me and offered to help, but I dont know where they can be of help. Recently I told a few friends that when I wake up , I want to be surrounded by beauty(no pun intended), but I dont see any beauty in existence.
As a result of this persistent depression which got chronic after Amy winehouse death, (i know this is not funny), I took a break from work last week and decided to chill out.
So now that you have a background, I have decided to fight this depression. I feel I need to push myself, its not that I am a lazy person, I just see the futility in hardwork where most of you probably dont. I have decided to push my self in whatever i do, raise the bar by a couple of notches. See the view from another point of you. I wish i had someone who would push me, but anyone who comes close to the same, i get rid of the person asap. But I still want someone to push me!
So the idea to is bench mark myself against myself, see that I am excelling moving/rising. See that my relationships are nurtured, be patient and learn to trust.