Love, love, love! It is everywhere. We are all begging for more love. We just want people to love us. Love has its upside but have you ever thought about the downside of love?
You who have ruined you health and life searching for love, somebody to love. What if I told you, that you could be better off without LOVE.
Let us get the upside of love out of the way
Love is a great de-stresser.
It is a great antidote to chronic stress. As you very well know that science now has discovered that stress weakens the immune system and it is responsible for all the major diseases from a heart attack to cancer. It has even gone and debunked “ diseases are passed via gene’s theory”.
Yes, Love can save your life by making you less stressed in life.
Love is a safety net
When you love someone, the promise is basically something like this –
“I will take care of you or I want to be taken care by you.”
This manifests itself in a term called Attachment. When you are attached to a parent, husband, you are basically promising to take care of the person or you are asking to be taken care off.
Love is leverage
Pair bonding is the 1st unit of the tribe and Love is how to extend your tribe. You produce children, friends and get more relatives. This web of people promise to be there, to cheer you on your birthdays, anniversaries and to mourn on your grief.
This tribe is your community. They make your passage through life less harrowing by acting as a lubricant to your goals.
Sorry to keep you waiting, now you must be wondering what the fuck could be the downside of love.
Downside of love – You become a fake!
Do you like fake people? Lets define a fake person first. A person who is not aligned to his being is a fake or anyone who is not true to their inner self.
So you might ask how can love correlate to one becoming a fake. Well, love is needed for survival. Our children love us since they are born, they quickly learn not to piss off mom or dad. They know they have been punished in the past for not complying to their parents vision of what a good child should be.
Many people in their late 50”s are still working for their parents approval. It need not be a parent, it could be a elder sibling, it could be your husband or wife whose validation you seek all the time. You cannot imagine not living without their approval. It is hard-wired into your biology. Anyone you feel attached to is responsible for you not being true to yourself.
If you are always trying to please your loved one, when will you ever get time and courage to be your authentic true self. Does that ring a bell?
Have you ever sacrificed, a very important passion or pursuit for your loved one? Do you worry more about your loved one than you worry about yourself? These could be sign’s of your fakeness.
Ok, if this has got you interested, go and google “Dr. Gabor Mate” to learn more.